5 Tips to Increase Confidence in 2021
One of my favorite things about having a boudoir blog is being able to share additional photos from the portfolio and providing a more in-depth look and understanding of the photoshoots and some of the behind-the-scenes.
If there is only one rule in boudoir you must follow its portraying confidence. No one does it better than Jill.
If you have ever shot with me, there is a good chance that Jill was there as she is my friend and main hairstylist for Wonderland Boudoir. Jill is a master in all things hair. I mean that. She's actual a professor in hair at a local accredited school in Dallas. On top of being a full-time educator, she also runs her own hairstyling business. If that wasn't enough she also has her wig line where she creates customer wigs for her clients. I honestly don't know how she has the time.
Jill breathes so much life in me. She has one of the best attitudes I have met. She makes everyone feel comfortable as soon as she meets them. When she's available to shoot with me she always takes her time to make sure the client feels comfortable. She wants to know about your entire life story, and she also mentally preps you for the shoot.
I have done several boudoir sessions with Jill. She allows me to experiment and try new looks. Because Jill can do hair and makeup and already knows what to expect from my shooting style, all I have to do is concentrate on creating beautiful art.
Due to Jill's confidence and dedication to create outstanding images, I can create some of the best images. Today I want to provide 5 steps on how to become confident.
1.) STOP CARING WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK
Okay, if you leave with NOTHING else today this needs to be it. I get it. This Is SuCh A cLiChe. While that may be true, that doesn't erase the fact that you have to STOP GIVING A FUCK about what people may or may not thinking about you. Let me leave you with a God to honest truth. No one is thinking about you as much as you're thinking about yourself. The main person judging your existence is you. Too often do we project our insecurities onto other people. This sometimes leads to creating a false narrative.
One of the best books I have read about building self-confidence is the Subtle Art of Not Giving a fuck by Mark Manson. This book provides an authentic account of how much better your life becomes when you stop focusing on the things or people who don't matter.
Don’t wake up 30 years from now upset you didn’t live the life you wanted due to baseless fears. Even if they are legitimate, you owe it to yourself to try. For you. You are reason enough.
2.) Be Unapologetically Yourself
Self-love is the greatest middle finger of all times. We live in a world that tries to constantly remind us that if we aren't wearing these clothes, have the best bodies, or if don’t have the latest bag then we are losing in life. While I'm all for new clothes or a hot new make-up or hairstyle, remember that those things don't define who you are. Those are a mask. You can buy as many designer sunglasses as your want, but that won't cover up any doubts of self-love you have for yourself. Material possessions don't define you.
3.) It's okay to ask for help
This one was a personal hard one for me. For a long time (and at times, still is) one of the hardest things you can do. For me, it's because I don't want to be a burden to my family or friends. I also don't want to seem weak or look like I can't solve issues myself. But the fact is, at some point in life, we are all going to need help. You have to let go of your ego and pride to do that. Allowing yourself to show your vulnerabilities creates a deeper bond with the person you are sharing them with. Thus creating a stronger connection.
4.) BLOCK IS YOUR FRIEND
Block people, accounts, phone numbers, social media sites, or anything that makes you question who you are or your self-confidence. I will be transparent here. There are several photographers that I muted on Instagram. Not because they aren't incredible and create some of the most gorgeous content I have ever seen. It's because I was spending way too much time comparing my progress with theirs. While I know that my journey and path are not the same as theirs, it still was painful to see them living this life of pure entrepreneurship travel, and everything people dream of. It hurt to block them, but my mental health and the goals I set for myself were way more important to me. Block is a true ally on the road to self-confidence. Yes, while I know not everything you see is what you really get on social. I still blocked them.
5.) Your Past Does Not Define You
Listen, we are all an accumulation of our past decisions. One of the most counterproductive things we can do as we grow in our journey is constantly looking back and reveling in past mistakes. You need to permit grant yourself forgiveness for things that happened in the past. You need to move past embarrassing mistakes... or better yet, fully own them. Fact is, we are going to stumble often on this journey. No one is immune to that. Perfection is a pure myth. Allow yourself to write a new story and start a new life. Leverage the lessons you learned in the past to help forge a better future with you. Let your past be the catalyst for a beautiful life.
I hope you loved these awesome shots of the lovely Jill. If you want to schedule a session with me, fill out the form below, and let's take the next steps.
